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Yo!

I come to you today with good and bad news. The good: Today I managed to control my dream by thinking about it. The bad: Apparently, dream-Vegard does not have the same idea of fun that awake-Vegard has.

My dream pretty much consisted of me going to the train station, buying a ticket for the airport express train, forgetting it in the machine and getting on the train anyways. When the train had departed I realized that I had forgotten my ticket. But then the thought hit me: I do not recognize that train station, or indeed this train. This must be a dream!! Awesome, that means I can get my ticket. And then, by the magic of thought, my ticket was in my hand.

I was satisfied, and kept riding the train. My magical ticket worked.

Worst lucid dream experience ever.

Vegard

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…baby, baby, baby, oohhhh!

Ahh, now that my day has been brightened, I must discuss some issues I am currently having with life.

I have this volunteer job where I do random shizack for an organization that shall remain nameless. Recently I have come to the realization that I’m in too bloody deep of water without even a popsicle stick as a paddle. I’ve been there for, eh, about 3 months doing odds and ends around the office and helping out at the occasional fund raising event (one particular event being the dinner auction from Hell by the way), when suddenly I have been tasked with organizing the huge annual summer party for 2011. Although I straight-up told my boss that I was uncomfortable with that much responsibility, I have somehow ended up as the Committee Chair of the whole event. So here I am, socially awkward little 20-year old Elaine, having to make cold calls to restaurants pleading for food donations and compiling reports on information that I don’t even have a damned clue about. I feel failure fast-approaching like a raven upon the wind!!

And that is why I have turned to the Biebs. I’ve been told his voice has the healing powers of Jesus, and to that I abide.

You smile….I smile….duu duduu duududud ududu…
I just need somebody to loooooooooooooo-o-ove!

(I have no idea if those lyrics are correct or if they are even from Justin Bieber songs, but it’s the best I got.)

Until further notice, I bid you all adieu and hope to not lose my mind.
Elaine

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Good morning!

I say morning, because I just woke up. This night, in my dreams I had a vision of what socialism will be like in the future. Behold:

For unknown reasons, I become mayor of some town south in Norway, without living there or careing at all. But in this town which I rule, there is a bakery which makes a ridiculous amount of money,  several tens of thousands of whatever currency you use (be it Norwegian kroner, dollahs or euros). In my infinate socialist mayor-powers, I nationalize this bakery and use its surplus to construct an awesome new transnational railway.

This railway is awesome because:

  1. For some reason, it’s blue!
  2. It is entirely filled with water, and all travelers get heir own scuba-tank
  3. The food is free, awesome gourmet-food, and for some magicall (probably socialist) reason, the water does not harm it
  4. It is really fast, and really cheap
  5. The conductor is a pandabear!

This is what socialism will be like, people. Spread the word!

Vegard

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Dang, that would be a good title for a departure blog. Alas, my friends, I do not plan on going anywhere. Until I am forcefully (as forcefully as you can be via internet) removed from this BRBcoffee “corner of the web,” I shall be posting random shit as per usual.

Let me start off with a quote that came up whilst talking to a friend about Elton John:
“I don’t care if his wee wee has been in many, many butt holes. I’d let it be in mine as well.”
There, now it is saved for all of eternity.

Currently I am at school, procrastinating studying for my upcoming two tests. And as they say, when in Procrastination mode, do as the Procrastinators do…wait, that doesn’t really make any sense because, in essence, procrastinators do nothing; therefore how can you do as they do?

MINDFUCK!

I want a donut.

Peace out!
Elaine

*This blog was brought to you by Pure Random; cause when you need to be random, you need to blog.*

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