[poll id=”21″]
There is a male that lives in this household who does not wash his hands after using the bathroom. I know this for a fact, seeing as my study and general “hanging out” area is very near the bathroom. Countless times have I seen him enter the commode, heard the toilet flush, and in a matter of nanoseconds he is out of there. Now, I’m no scientist, but I am fairly certain that the time in between the toilet flushing and the door opening leaves absolutely no possibility of a proper handwash taking place.
Pardon my French, but that is fucking sick.
I wash my hands every time I use the restroom- with soap, warm water, and for a good 30 seconds. I do it mostly because of the frightening thought of who has been there before me and touched all the handles. However, if I regularly had to hold my dirty, urine-spouting penis every time I used the toilet, I’d be washing for a whole different reason. But nooope, not with this one- he could probably take a crap on his hand and he’d just be like, “Eh, it’s just poop. Let me wipe it off on the door handle and call it a day.”
Argghhh, men! Why do you have to be so yucky?
Ok, so I may be a tiny bit of a germaphobe (which isn’t a word by the way, and therefore my auto-corrector has suggested ‘hermaphrodite’ as a correction), but what’s so bad about that? Maybe if there had been a few more of us germaphobes about back in the day, perhaps the Black Plague wouldn’t have wiped out 1/3 of Europe, hm? Well, that’s a pretty horrible supposition, but you see where I’m going with this. Humans have had to develop germ-paranoia because it has been [and still is] incredibly deadly.
In conclusion (<— one of the worst ways to begin a conclusion), I’d like to ask all the men and women and babies and dexterous animals out there to make a conscious effort to wash your motha flippin hands/paws/cyborg arms. Do it after you use the restroom, before you prepare food, and whenever else you feel like it!
Good Day!
