Never before in my life has it been quite so painfully obvious that I have nothing going for me.
I’m still living at home, no job, no life, and the only thing I do have- my attempt at a college education- I’m starting to not care about. I don’t know why it hit me all of a sudden.
Perhaps it is because of the imminent change coming to my life: this cushy living arrangement I’ve had with just myself and my mom is coming to a quick close. I loved what we had going here, and it saddens me that it will never be the same again. That’s life, I suppose, always changing and whatnot.
The change which is coming to our living arrangement (one which I will not disclose on here) will most likely end up in me wanting to move out. It is near impossible for a student to find the means to do so, though, so I guess what really bothers me is the feeling of entrapment or lack of freedom. Every person goes through this, of course, but that doesn’t make it suck any less.
Le sigh…the word “I” has come up an awful lot in this blog. Rather disgusting, no? Innocent humanitarians are being killed by Israel right now, and I have the nerve to bitch about my life? Okay, Elaine, time to get a grip on life and learn to go with the flow.
There. It’s time to move on.
Peace!
